Mafiosa (Blood for Blood #3) Page 18

  ‘No,’ I agreed. ‘It’s not.’

  ‘My father didn’t believe in silly things like affection or love. He liked order and deference. He wanted me to marry my second cousin to keep the Genovese bloodline strong.’

  ‘Ew,’ I said, before I could stop myself.

  Elena’s laugh was a passing tinkle. ‘Yes. Exactly. You can imagine how angry the great Don Genovese was when I ran away with Angelo Falcone instead.’

  I remembered what Donata had told me about the situation. Do you know what he gifted to my sister on the night of their wedding? My father’s death.

  ‘Angelo killed your father.’ The words were out of my mouth before I could swallow them back. I winced, feeling the prick of the needle more keenly now.

  ‘Yes, Angelo killed my father, but not before he made an attempt on our lives.’ She sighed, and I could almost feel it in my bones. The sadness, the weariness. ‘He didn’t have a choice. For us, it was kill or be killed.’

  I sucked in a breath. ‘Your father really tried to murder you? Because you fell in love?’

  ‘Because I fell in love with the wrong man and tied myself to the wrong family,’ Elena explained. ‘He would have preferred a dead daughter over a Falcone one. I think that’s why he tried to do it on my wedding night. As a lesson to others in the Genovese family. As a warning. He wanted me to die in my wedding dress.’

  I wondered if my father felt the same way about me. I hoped not – though with Jack, the sentiment was clear. He had been ready to haul me away with Donata tonight – to let her torture me for turning my back on the Marino family.

  ‘When my father sent his soldato for me, I was in the shower, about to get ready for bed with my new husband.’ I felt her shudder at the memory, but she continued, her voice strong. ‘It was my cousin Johnny. I screamed when I saw him burst in, and if his gun hadn’t misfired, I would have died right there in the water. But Angelo was in the dressing room, and he got to him first. I guess Johnny thought I was alone.’

  ‘That sounds terrifying,’ I said, imagining that particular brand of fear.

  ‘It was,’ she said quietly. ‘Right after that, Angelo called Paulie and they paid my father a final visit together.’ She swallowed hard, cleared her throat, and said, ‘The end was quick.’

  ‘God,’ I said. What a mess these Mafia families made for each other. ‘And your sister never forgave you.’ It was a statement, not a question.

  ‘Donata was in the house the night Angelo killed my father. He could have killed her, too, but I asked him to spare her. Despite the fact we never saw eye to eye, despite her hatred of me and what I had done, I didn’t want him to harm her.’ She tapped my arm to indicate she was done with the stitches. I opened my eyes to find her icy blue gaze swimming with unshed tears. ‘I spend every day of my life regretting that decision. I spend every waking moment wondering whether she will take one of my sons from me, like she almost took Gino during that fire.’ She blinked, and the tears vanished. ‘I think it is the worst decision I ever made.’

  Elena ran her fingers over the scrape wounds in my neck. ‘A gift from my sister?’ she asked.

  I nodded.

  She pulled her hair from her neck, craning it away from me so that under the light I could see three faint white lines stretching from her collarbone around to the back of her ear. ‘Snap,’ she said, a macabre smirk twisting on her face. ‘She did this to me when the boy she had a crush on asked me to the prom instead. Of course I didn’t go with him, but the offence was enough to warrant the scars.’

  ‘She’s crazy,’ I breathed.

  ‘Yes,’ Elena said simply. ‘I’m glad you are away from her.’

  The sentiment pricked my heart, and I thought for a horrifying moment that I might cry. It had been a long night. ‘Thank you,’ I said quietly. ‘For helping me tonight … and for being nice to me.’

  Elena nodded. ‘It is not unheard of to leave one Mafia family for another, if you feel there is something or someone calling out to you.’ I avoided her gaze, tried to ignore any implicit meanings that may or may not have existed in that statement. ‘If you are prepared to endanger yourself for the safety of my boys, I am prepared to do the same for you. We look after each other, now. All of us. If my sons can trust you, then so can I.’

  She went back to work, fixing a square bandage over the stitches in my shoulder. She pulled back, took two pills from the case and then closed it up, folding the pills into my hands. ‘You’ll need these painkillers. I’ll get you a prescription for more and I’ll send one of the boys to pick them up. Try not to move around too much over the next few days, and get a good night’s sleep.’ She squeezed my good arm once, then got to her feet. ‘You did well tonight, Sophie. You were brave. You were a Falcone.’ She turned from me then, her silk robe trailing behind her as she left.

  I swallowed the pills without bothering with water. A few minutes later, Nic appeared in the doorway to my bedroom. ‘Well?’

  ‘Twelve stitches, no bullet,’ I said. ‘Lucky me.’

  ‘Congratulations!’ His smile was all teeth. ‘Your first official Mafia wound. And twelve stitches. That’s impressive.’

  ‘Is it?’ I pulled the blanket tighter around my arms, covering up all the skin that had been marred with blood.

  ‘Don’t,’ he said, coming into the room. ‘Let me see.’

  Reluctantly, I dropped the blanket, revealing my heavily bloodstained arm. There was a thick gauze plaster covering the wound on my shoulder.

  He whistled. ‘Whoa. That’s intense.’

  I smiled weakly. ‘Tis but a scratch.’

  ‘You’re hardcore, Soph.’

  My head was starting to swim. I didn’t know what Elena had given me, but I was going all bendy and light-headed. ‘I feel very soft and squishy right now,’ I said. ‘And also, bloody. Very bloody.’

  ‘Hang on.’ Nic left the room, returning a moment later with a hand towel. He sat down beside me and took my hand in his, laying it across his knee. I just sat there, all floppy, as the painkillers slipped into my system and my lids grew heavy, and watched as he pressed the wet towel against my arm.

  ‘Thanks, Nic,’ I said, watching him clean the blood away, bit by bit. His head was bent at an angle, his dark brows pulled together. His touch was so gentle I barely felt it.

  ‘It’s kind of sexy,’ he said, taking my fingers in his, and carefully scrubbing the towel across them, removing the dried blood in my fingernails. ‘All this blood.’

  I smiled blissfully at the crown of his head. ‘That is such a stupid thing to say.’

  His laugh was a low rumble in his chest.

  ‘Did Luca speak to Valentino yet?’

  ‘He’s briefed him,’ Nic answered without looking up.

  ‘Was Valentino angry?’ I asked.

  Nic shrugged. ‘Valentino’s always angry. Luca wants him to push for a truce. Valentino is considering it.’

  ‘Really?’

  ‘Yeah.’ Nic snapped his head up. ‘Stupid, right?’

  ‘What did Luca say?’

  ‘I guess he just can’t believe they all showed up at a high school. I mean, that’s so messed up.’

  ‘Yeah,’ I echoed.

  ‘Luca says there are no rules any more, no shred of honour left between our families, and if we don’t agree to a truce now, then we’re all going to suffer for it.’

  It was too much to process. I could only hang on to one thought at once. ‘What happened to Zola Marino?’ I asked. ‘We left her unconscious in a hallway.’

  ‘She’s been taken into police custody,’ he said. ‘They’re calling her a lone shooter on the news.’

  ‘Will she talk?’

  A mirthless smile. ‘Not a chance.’

  ‘Will she get bail?’

  ‘If Donata has anything to do with it. She’s got half of Chicago PD in her pocket.’ He pulled the towel away and lifted my hand to inspect it. ‘Tonight was a disaster.’

  ‘It won’t be like that
next time.’

  ‘There might not be a next time, if they get their truce.’

  ‘No,’ I said. ‘We can’t cower, not now.’

  ‘Tell that to Valentino and Luca,’ Nic said, his tone clipped.

  ‘There’s no speaking to them when they get like this.’

  ‘I don’t want a truce, Nic.’

  ‘And you think I do?’ he said, incredulous. ‘We deserve revenge. You deserve revenge. Tonight was difficult, but you escaped. Donata ended up losing, not us.’ He rolled his eyes, frustration gathering in the corners of his puckered mouth. ‘I don’t know why Luca can’t see it like that.’

  ‘I’ll have a gun next time. We’ll be better prepared.’ I don’t know why I was fighting so hard. I suppose beneath the fear and the pain and the sudden realization of my own precarious mortality, there was a feeling of strength, of my own determination. I was strong. I had survived tonight. I had helped Luca. And I would survive again. We all would. ‘I’m not afraid, Nic. I’m not afraid of what they’ll do, and I’m not afraid of what I can do.’

  He smiled at me, a slow curl of his lips. ‘See,’ he said. ‘You are hardcore.’

  He moved the cloth up my arm, brushing the inside of my elbow, his fingers inching around my wrist.

  He slid his arm back down. Without meaning to, he was holding my hand, and my fingers were curled inside his. We were much closer than I realized. He was tracing small circles around the wound in my shoulder with his free hand, tenderly cleaning off the dregs of disinfectant and blood.

  ‘What are you doing?’ I was suddenly so unbearably tired.

  He took his hand away, folding the cloth in his lap. ‘I’m proud of you, Soph,’ he said earnestly. ‘You were amazing tonight. A true Falcone.’

  I smiled at him. ‘Thank you.’ The words slipped off my tongue, husky and far more intimate than I intended. ‘You smell like a forest.’

  The corner of his lip flickered. ‘Looks like the pain meds are kicking in.’

  CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

  ONE HUNDRED GRAVES

  ‘What unique brand of violent romanticism is this?’ I snapped my head up to find Millie standing in the doorway to my room. ‘Because I do not love it.’

  ‘It’s called friendship,’ I said, pulling back from Nic, realizing in a moment of fleeting clarity that perhaps it did look like something different, something I didn’t intend.

  She strode into the room, her heels and dress still miraculously intact, the black fishtail trailing behind her. ‘I have now been fully debriefed and suitably threatened by Valentino as per your request, Mr Falcone, sir.’

  ‘I didn’t tell him to threaten you,’ Nic said. ‘I told him to calm you down. You were getting hysterical.’

  ‘Huh,’ Millie mused. ‘Well, I guess he threw that part in for free. Anyways, consider my lips sealed. I do want to see my parents live into old age, you know.’

  Nic ground out an unintelligible curse. ‘Did he really threaten your family?’

  Millie smiled sardonically at him. ‘Only a smidge. May I have a word with my best friend now, please?’

  Nic got up, muttering something to Millie before taking his leave and shutting the door behind him.

  Millie wheeled around and flipped her hair away from her face. ‘A blood war,’ she said.

  It felt like my head was floating several inches above my neck. My fingertips were a little numb. I nodded.

  ‘Are you freaking kidding me, Soph? Is this some sort of cruel Halloween prank where you dress up as someone I don’t know?’

  I flinched at the implication. If only she knew what the real disguise was – the person who had been hanging out with her these past few months, forcing smiles and feigning interest in a future that was no longer within reach.

  ‘You’re in a blood war!’ she repeated. ‘When the hell were you going to tell me? Or was I supposed to just join the dots at your funeral?’

  I raised my hands in the air, trying to placate her. ‘I’ll explain, Mil.’

  ‘You can definitely try, but I doubt you’ll talk your way out of this.’

  ‘I didn’t want to worry you,’ I said. ‘That’s kind of how it works in the underworld. The less you know, the safer you are. I never in a million years thought something like tonight would happen. I never would have knowingly put you in danger like that. I’m sorry.’

  She pinched the bridge of her nose. ‘I would actually throttle you if you weren’t already injured, Soph. I swear to God, for a smart girl, you are acting like the dumbest person on the planet right now. You think my main point of contention is that you didn’t tell me about the blood war? No, my main issue is that you are in the middle of a blood war. How the hell did that happen?’

  I blinked at her, feeling an overwhelming urge to slump over and sleep for a hundred years. ‘You know I’m a Marino. You know what they did to Mom.’

  ‘What exactly are you trying to achieve by living here in the middle of all this violence? Do you realize you almost got killed tonight?’

  ‘I realize that.’

  ‘Hanging out with this family is probably the worst thing you could be doing right now,’ she pressed. ‘They’ve painted a big fat target on your forehead.’

  ‘The target was already there, Mil. The Marinos are after me too. We’re safer if we stick together. Without them, I’m like a sitting duck.’

  ‘And?’ Millie prompted. ‘Is that it?’

  ‘What?’ I said.

  ‘Is that the only reason why you’re here?’

  ‘What are you talking about?’ Her meaning was not connecting inside my fuzzy head, but I could tell she was angling at something.

  ‘I spoke to Gino downstairs,’ she continued. ‘I guess he thought you had told me everything on the car ride here …’

  ‘I did,’ I lied.

  ‘Did you?’ she challenged.

  I shrugged.

  ‘You didn’t tell me you have a gun now.’

  ‘I—’

  ‘Oh, I’m sorry. Two guns,’ she clarified.

  I flinched again. ‘Gino should not have told you that.’

  She dropped her jaw. ‘So I’m an outsider now?’

  ‘Not like that,’ I said, instantly regretting my tactlessness. ‘I just meant, he should be more discreet. It’s not like he—’

  She raised her hand to cut me off. ‘You also didn’t tell me how good a shooter you’ve become.’

  I looked at my hands, the shame painting circles of warmth across my cheeks. ‘I didn’t see the point in telling you. It’s nothing.’

  ‘It’s nothing,’ she repeated. ‘So, it’s a hobby?’

  I didn’t dare meet her eyes. ‘Something like that.’

  ‘You expect me to believe that? You think I haven’t seen how angry you’ve become? How different you are? You think I can’t look at my best friend and see that jagged, broken heart – the darkness in your eyes when you speak about Jack, the way you bristle when I mention your dad? You think I don’t know how cut up you are over your mother? You think,’ she sucked in a breath, her voice wobbling, ‘I don’t know that the reason you spend so much time shooting that gun is because you want to point it at your uncle’s head the next time you see him and pull the trigger?’

  My face fell. I was too tired to rearrange it in time. Of course she could see through me – I don’t know why I ever believed she couldn’t. She knew me better than anyone.

  ‘I see it,’ she said. ‘Even now, you can’t hide it from me, so don’t bother trying. You’re here for safety, sure, but you’re also here for revenge. Admit it. If you value the trust we have, then you’ll stop lying to me.’

  I forced myself to look at her – my best friend, beautiful and funny and smart and brave and still glowing in her gown. And here I was, bullet-wounded below her, crumpled in her mother’s blue dress, and still afraid to show her who I really was inside even though she already knew.

  Millie was the only one left. Take off the mask. If tonight had
proved anything, it’s that you can’t run from who you are.

  ‘OK,’ I relented.

  ‘OK?’ She stood in front of me, her arms folded.

  ‘I’ve allied myself with the Falcones because I want Jack to suffer the way he made my mother suffer, the way he’s made me suffer,’ I told her. ‘I want to kill him. It’s not a whim or a stroke of grief. It’s the right thing, and I want to be the one to do it. The Falcones will help me, and after I’m done, I want to kill Donata Marino, too. I won’t rest until I have my retribution. I won’t rest until Jack has been brought to justice. I’ve always been part of this underworld, Millie. I have it in my blood and my heart. I’m not running from it any more. I’m not running from who I am.’ I leant back on my elbows, so she could see the truth in my expression.

  A strangled laugh caught in her throat.

  ‘That’s the truth,’ I said. ‘The old Sophie is dead. She never really existed, and this person is who I’m supposed to be.’

  She gaped at me. All of her teeth visible at once, her jaw slack with surprise. ‘Oh, Soph. You can’t be serious.’

  ‘I am as serious as this gunshot wound in my shoulder.’ I was on a roll now. She might as well know all of it. ‘In fact, I have never been more serious about anything in my life. I didn’t want to show you this side of me. I didn’t want to frighten you or put you in danger or have you look at me the way you’re looking at me right now but the truth is I’m sick of being weak and helpless, I’m sick of being on the sidelines of my own life, and I’m sick of letting other people make decisions for me. I’m taking back my power. It’s messy, and it’s dark and it’s scary, but I’m not afraid, Millie. This is who I am.’

  She let the silence stretch out between us. Horror roiled over her face. She crossed her arms over her chest, pushing her silver-diamond pendant upwards until it flickered underneath the lights.

  ‘I’m sorry,’ I said. ‘I’m sorry I’m not the friend you deserve and I’m sorry I put you in danger tonight. I’m sorry I ruined your mother’s beautiful dress, I’m sorry I ruined your dance, and I’m sorry you have to stand here with me right now, with that look on your face.’

  Her face crumpled. ‘Soph—’